Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Review: Prometheus.

Yep, bueno- continuaria la tradicion de este abandonado blog de escribir en ingles, pero no. Tal vez deberia, viendo como no tengo un teclado que me deje expresame en 'spanish' como deberia; para eso esta el spanglish. Lo siento!

Con eso aclarado, la primera movie que comentare en el regreso de este lugar, fue, tristemente, una gran decepcion. A nivel historia al menos- porque visualmente, Prometheus es una delicia a los ojos. Desde las vistas al espacio exterior, asi como los recorridos dentro de la nave que le da nombre al film, es raro tener en pantalla una escena que, a primera vista, no resulte original, intrigante, interesante. Al menos hasta que alguno de los personajes abre la boca- en ese momento, no puedes evitar perder la concentracion y pensar "que carajos dijo?!?"

Un breve sumario del film, antes de la carniceria- un grupo de cientificos creen haber encontrado un mensaje dejado por los responsables de que haya vida en nuestro planeta, nombrandolos Engineers. Este mensaje revela como llegar a un planeta muy, muy lejano- y obviamente, si dejaron este mensaje, fue para que los buscaramos, right? Right. En fin, se organiza una mision/expedicion a este planeta, y la tripulacion de la nave Prometheus se embarca asi en una mision donde la inteligencia de la raza humana esta bajo cuestion todo el tiempo, asi como nuestra tolerancia ante la estupidez de otros.

Veamos- si tienes un grupo de cientificos/especialistas que, en teoria, son los mejores en sus respectivos campos, uno pensaria que las cosas maravillosas y extranias/nuevas que se van presentando durante el transcurso de la movie seran explicadas, o al menos se hara el intento de ponerlo en palabras que la persona promedio pueda entender y como los marcianitos de Toy Story, decir ohhh. Pero no, al parecer la gente brillante, ante el posible descubrimiento mas grande de la historia de la humanidad, actua de manera estupida e irracional, sin pensar no solo en su propia seguridad, sino en consecuencias que afecten el motivo de viajar por el espacio durante 'n' anios a un lugar desconocido. Ademas de que, a disposicion del script, algunos personajes sufren perdida de memoria si la siguiente escena lo requiere (que tal el "cartografo" que se pierde en cuanto se separa del grupo?? o el biologo, cuya reaccion ante una forma de vida ALIEN es tratar de domesticarla? What the hell?)

Claro que todo esto hace sentido- si es que queremos dar la impresion de que los humanos somos formas de vida inferiores o carentes de razon/logica. Asi, si, para despistar a extraterrestres. Genius!

Por otro lado, cual es el punto de introducir una gran pregunta central interesante, si en vez de responderla o dar algunos detalles para dejarlo a discrecion personal, se ignora por completo dicha pregunta (que se supone es el backbone de la movie!) y en lugar de eso, solo se presentan mas y mas preguntas/elementos que a la vez tampoco seran explicados? Para el final de la movie, nadie recuerda que carajos era la mision en un principio del Prometheus, y lo mas importante- creo que a nadie le importa mas tener respuesta alguna de todo el desmadre que es la movie.

Es dificil cuando teniendo tantos elementos buenos regados por todo el film, te das cuenta que realmente no sabian como usar todos esos juguetes bonitos y pristinos. En vez de eso, Prometheus se vuelve un ejercicio de paciencia de 2 horas, entre tener que soportar a un cast de idiotas en el espacio (con un par de excepciones; es de notar que David, el robot, se roba la movie) y sufrir una pelicula que no sabe realmente que es- si es sci-fi, si es terror, o si es comedia. Y ese es el crimen fundamental de Prometheus; no poder definir algo, nada, en momento alguno.

Pero bueno- tengo que decir que, con todo y eso, diria que vale la pena verse en una pantalla grande, si acaso solo porque de nuevo, los visuales de esta movie son increibles. Y quien sabe, hay varias personas que parece que realmente la disfrutaron. A mi no me gusta eso de "apagar el cerebro" para olvidar la logica y ver un espectaculo/film; ok, de repente es bueno tener un guilty pleasure, todos tenemos uno, pero creo que con el resume de Ridley Scott, y siendo una prequel de cierta manera a Alien, pues... es imposible no esperar algo en ese nivel, o cerca al menos.


Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Mini-TV Review Update :: August 2011 Edition.

Ok, let us remember how the year in TV has been so far!
I will try to expand on these micro-reviews at some point:


FRINGE
Renewed, still going pretty well. Season finale was pretty good.

FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS
Cancelled, one of the best shows on TV ever. So sad to see it go.

SUPERNATURAL
Very random season, but season finale makes me look forward to whatever's next.

SMALLVILLE
Cancelled, season was good up until the very anti-climatic ending. Oh well.

THE OFFICE
Renewed, but probably won't care much for next season. Nostalgia shouldn't be a selling point, ever.

GAME OF THRONES
Renewed, amazing and awesome, one of the must-watch shows of 2011.

ARCHER
Renewed, freaking fun and surprising show.

ALPHAS
New, this is how HEROES should have been done. Liking it very much, hope it keeps it up.

CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM
Cancelled, the last season of this show has been a nice surprise after it kind of bored me during s5 and s6. Glad I got back into it.

BREAKING BAD
Renewed, one of the shows I always look forward to watching, several times even just so I can get everything in. One of the best show on TV right now.


And I'll make a special mention here:

LOUIE
I don't know if I can find it in me to try to come up with a review or explanation for the unbelievable greatness that lies in the ~20 minutes that every episode of LOUIE every week. It's first season last year was without a doubt the sleeper hit show of 2010, and even though this year he has gotten more exposition, I still think that many people are missing out. And even more importantly- even if they watched, I don't know how many would get the point.

This is a funny show, that is brutal, honest and self-aware. It will make you laugh. It will make you cry. But more importantly, it will make you think and reflect. And that is something that all the other shows on TV right now can't do, or aren't even trying. Louie C.K. has found a way to do that, in a manner that is entertaining. I really cannot give more praise and express more admiration for this man and the miracle that is having a show like his in our day and age.


Monday, August 15, 2011

Mini-Movie Review Update :: August 2011 Edition.

Well, time to catch up on movie reviews, although in a very brief manner, sadly. Time is of the essence. That said, here we go!



SOURCE CODE
From the same person who gave us MOON, came this amazing and original piece of sci-fi. I really liked CODE a lot, and would've easily been a contender for one of my top 3 films of the year (so far) if it had dared to be more ballsy with its ending. As much as I enjoy "happy endings," a not so definite one in this instance would've elevated SC into true greatness, imo.

HANNA
From the previews I saw way before it came out, I thought I would end up loving HANNA to death. However, the lack of anything to hold on emotionally to her really made it difficult to give a damn whether she succeeded or not. Still worth a look though, lots of interesting things to learn from this movie, and the score by The Chemical Brothers is amazing.

UNKNOWN
Someone get Liam Neeson a better agent. Such a dumb movie. I mean, if you can't figure out the ending halfway through (and I'm convinced you can even earlier than that) maybe there's a chance you'd like it. Avoid, imo.

THOR
Though the general idea/concept was terrific, I think the execution was handled a bit poorly, not really fit for the God of Thunder. However, this doesn't mean that the movie sucked; it was actually quite entertaining. Loki ended up stealing the show.

BRIDESMAIDS
I'll confess that I didn't have high hopes for this one, but was more than pleasantly surprised at how good, smart and fucking funny this movie is. Everyone in here is great. Truly one of the pseudo-sleeper hits of the year. Looking forward to whatever Melissa McCarthy does next- as long as Hollywood doesn't turn her into a female Zach Galifianakis.

YOUR HIGHNESS
And this one was a letdown. It does have its moments, but in the end, there just isn't enough to really make it memorable or recommendable.

HORRIBLE BOSSES
This one had it all to be a freaking good time, but instead they went for mediocrity. Really, I don't get it when shit like this happens. The movie isn't bad, but when you realize just how damn good it could have been, well, you kind of feel cheated on.

GREEN LANTERN
I remember when they premiered a ton of footage during WonderCon for GL. And Ryan Reynolds really sold it that day- I was truly excited for a superhero movie once again, and one whom I'm not a fan of in particular. Man, was I wrong. To say that this movie was a fucking letdown, would be gentle. I'll put it this way- after watching it, I wanted to throw away my GL shirt. It is that bad.

RUBBER
Technically, this was out back in 2010, but didn't see a bigger release until earlier this year. Not exactly a commercial movie by any means, but if you really can get past the in-your-face commentary about modern filmmaking, it is a charming little piece of miracle cinema. Have to give mad props to Mr. Oizo for something so weird and original.



Ok, I shall continue at some point soon; way too many movies to go through, too little time to remember them all.


Thursday, August 11, 2011

Summer 2011 Movie Rankings.

Oh, this will be easy:

1) Attack The Block

The rest of the list I'll try to figure out sometime, complete with explanations. But yeah; ATB is the freaking real deal. This film, this is what movies are all about, what they're supposed to be. Freaking mind-blowing.

Believe bruv.


Saturday, July 2, 2011

Review: "Transformers: Dark of the Moon"

Disclaimer: I do not intend to sound like every other Transformers review out there, but I mean, C'MON- it's not like I can do much about it. Shit is what shit is.

So, without further ado; after the disappointment of massive proportions that REVENGE OF THE FALLEN was, did Michael Bay achieve the impossible and actually make a decent Transformers movie this time around?

Short answer: hell no.

What went wrong? Pretty much the same stuff as the other two movies before this one. The story doesn't even try to make any sense, there's way too much focus on the (boring and stupid) human characters than the (boring and bland) robots, and the only reason you might find yourself sitting in a theater to watch this orgy of CGI and 3D is because of the 'cool' trailer that came out not long ago. Plus, all your friends and their grandmas swear that the 3D is the best use of it ever.

Which it is, don't get me wrong. Especially after watching this film in IMAX 3D, it is amazing what Bay did with the technology. The movie looks great, and you can actually (sort of ) tell who is fighting who in any given action sequence. If anything, watching the last 50-40 min. of this film on the IMAX screen is just awe-inspiring, to say the least.

But that doesn't make up for all the dumb stuff that precedes it. From Sam's new girlfriend (seriously? I think it's more possible for Autobots to actually land on our planet than have that happen in real life) and his obnoxious parents to new characters, which seem like refugees from some (really bad) screwball comedy; you just can't help but with that the Decepticons do manage to gain control of the world and enslave this cast of assholes who aren't likeable in the least. Oh, but speaking of Decepticons- their plans of world dominance, or reconstruction, or whatever the hell their plans are (cause they seem to change according to what day of the week it is) do not have any real progress to them. They teleport to Washington to begin their invasion, only to THEN move to Chicago to blast it to pieces. I mean... couldn't they have just teleported THERE in the first place? Did they want to go in a mini road trip of sorts before their invasion began? I have no clue.

Again, trying to make sense of anything in the movie is just... a waste of time.

I suppose I could go on and on, bitching about it nonstop. Was I let down? I guess not, since the bar was lowered WAY too much this time around- I guess I was actually expecting a worst movie. But isn't that sad? I mean, I was not disappointed on the basis that I thought this would suck EVEN MORE. Sadness, I shed metallic tears for the Autobots.

And that reminds me- how the hell did Optimus Prime go from being Uncle Exposition to Gangster #1 in the blink of an eye?! What the hell man!!! All that was missing from that last scene, was Optimus spitting on "someone's" corpse and saying YOU GOT SERVED BITCH!

No, really. I wish I was kidding about that.

Thanks Mr. Bay, I no longer give a crap about Optimus Prime.

I foresee this movie making such a retarded amount of money, that I'm sure the fourth movie in the TRILOGY will be announced in a couple months. Yep, sounds about right- doesn't need to make sense, after all.

So, would I say go watch it?
If you have the money and time to spare, and don't care to throw logic out the window before entering the theater, I suppose it might be worth a look. If nothing, for the 3D, but again- that is the lamest excuse or defense for ANYTHING ever. If this is the future, I pray for a DeLorean to take me back to the age of Silent Cinema.